Expectations of the “Love” Day

The problem with holidays, especially Valentine’s Day, is that they put added pressure on many people to partner up.  Themed movies, commercials and sitcoms sensationalize the holidays to promote more consumer spending versus the historical meaning.  Tabloids feature the hottest date plans, gifts and destinations of the famous.

I’m not dissing romance. I’m all for it because I am a romantic at heart. But, I believe it’s important not to rely on that for your happiness in and outside of a relationship.  But, some who feel romance dependent around these times of the year may be subject to that kind of holiday stress or focused on what (or who) they don’t have instead of what they do have.

Never measure your self-worth by other people’s presence in (or absence from) your life. Whether it’s a partner, an on again off again lover or even family, your worth should be reflective of how you honor yourself first. Exercising a self-love ritual every day builds a strong foundation of happiness regardless of circumstances or people in your life. This could be as simple as a post it on your bathroom mirror.  Self- investment really is the best investment. And if you are looking for that special someone, becoming your best self attracts the healthier relationships. 

My life coach always says: “Always be the sole source of your happiness. Everyone else in your life should just add to it.”  She’s right! Never rely on others’ behaviors or big holiday date plans to feel validated. This is a healthier way to live and it creates a happier outlook on life itself. 

So, if you aren’t pampering for two this Valentine’s Day, don’t write the whole day off. Pamper for you!  And seriously, don’t wait for holiday seasons to come around either! 

Shouldn’t every day be the day of love? 

Part of my lifestyle and functional medicine coaching involves identifying any shortcomings in the self-love department. Many patients who struggle with their physical health realize their emotional health could be sabotaging progress. And several times it boils down to self-worth or self-love challenges. I welcome your comments below and please feel free to share this article.

Dr. Melanie

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